Saturday, May 16, 2009

Our first snake encounter

I'm starting to think I should rename my blog "Never a Dull Moment"

After living here almost three years - the one thing I've dreaded most since day 1 of moving to Arizona has finally happened...

I encountered a rattlesnake in our backyard.

Or should I say Porter encountered a rattlesnake.

I sent him back to clean up the toys in the yard and he comes in frantically excited, "There's a snake in the backyard, I found a snake!"

In a way only mothers can discern, I immediately know he's not telling one of his famous tall tales.

I head to the backyard, but I can't find anything. Porter points - "look mom right there, right there!" I still can't see anything, just a bunch of rocks. Then I spotted it, I was amazed at how the thing blended in so well to my perfect rattlesnake-camouflage backyard.



Now I'm wondering how many rattlesnakes I have passed by that I did not see before.

My neighbor friend came over to help me dispose of the snake. The same bus-stop mom friend I got too chatty with a while ago - we are partners in crime apparently.

The snake was curled up, but when we moved it, my fear was justified and we confirmed that it was indeed a rattler.

We decided to kill it - sorry Mr. Snake, I was too scared to move you to another place far away from me and my little ones.

If you look at the picture you can get an idea of exactly how close Porter was to the snake when he discovered it...

He was trying to pick up the soccer ball next to the snake, and the skinny gray thing in the corner is a broom that he dropped when he saw it. Yikes...

Thank goodness I pray to the Lord every night to protect my babies.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Good Hard Belly Laughin




Friday, May 8, 2009

Mom: Porter what are you eating?
Porter: I’m not eating I’m licking my hand?
Mom: Why are you licking your hand?
Porter: Because my hand is so dirty…



*Note: hand licking and giraffe feeding not related....


Thursday May 14, 2009

Porter and Sierra were on the floor. Porter, pretending to be a kitten, nuzzled up to Sierra, who was lying flat on her belly.
She replied, “You’re cuddling with a rattle snake ya know.”



Friday, May 8, 2009

I'm a GOOD parent gosh darnit!

WARNING: Long post, but it's worth it...

Just when I think Porter has done it all he comes up with a day like last Thursday, blowing me away.

This morning I was running late and Sierra was going to miss the bus. Porter was watching the Disney Channel so I told him to stay here and I was going to be right back.

Well, I made two mistakes.

First - I left Porter at home by himself (even though I was going to be gone for like 3 minutes – and I was only going to the bus stop around the corner)

Second - I got too chatty with my “bus-stop mom” friend Nila.

Well – after about 15 minutes (oops) we realized we were being too chatty and she walked me home.

On the way to my house we passed a police car in the street and a couple of neighbors

My heart began to get really nervous.

There was a police man outside my house with Porter. Apparently, Porter didn’t hear me when I said I was going to the bus-stop, he got worried, went outside crying in the street, “Where’s my Mommy and Daddy?” a neighbor came out, (one I don’t know – they are new) didn’t know who he was, called the cops, the cops got there lickety-split (since there are a million cops in Marana there is never one very far away), and I get busted for being too chatty at the bus-stop.

I felt humiliated and like the worst parent in the world. I thought it was only going to be like 2 minutes and besides I was just around the corner at the bus-stop – why do I feel so stinking guilty?

Am I just way too laid back of a parent or did I really screw up?? – maybe a little of each

I’m sorry people I’m sorry!

But the police man was very understanding when I told him what happened

So I decided I’d better give Porter extra good Mommy attention, so he wouldn’t ever think that I would run away from him again.

We went exploring together in the desert with Ella and I let him lead the way – we went where ever he wanted to go on the trails beside our house. Ahhhh- I felt like a good mom again.

Then I get a call from the school nurse that Sierra is not feeling well – I’m very suspicious the girl is playing hooky, but I end up bringing her home anyway.

Now, I have to run errands……

The fabric store……..

THE worst place to have to run errands with 3 little kids by yourself.

Porter is saying he deserves a treat for being so good. I’m tired of him saying this every time we go into a store, and I rebel – “no more treats!” I don’t care if you’re an angel.

I’m tired of my kids expecting they need a treat or some sort of reward every time they do something good.

Here I am trying to be a “good parent” – no spankings, no yelling, let’s do “positive reinforcement” Now I’m starting to believe this strategy is backfiring a little and creating spoiled children – what gives????

So after I tell him he can’t have a treat because he HASN’T been very good (he had been climbing on the fabric displays) he throws a fit in the store.

“Ok – keep cool – you’re a good parent,” I say to myself. Then I proceed to tell him in a calm voice why he cannot have a treat, all the while hoping that the store clerk will think what a wonderful, patient mother I am to this cute but energetic little boy.

Now I’m thinking “Why should I even give a rat’s behind about the store clerk’s opinion of my parenting techniques.” I mean really – does it matter what she thinks?

Maybe this stemmed from the whole “Cops coming to my house” thing this morning and I am determined to prove to the world that I AM a good parent!

Then after buying my piece of fabric I am on my way out the store when Sierra tells me “Mom Porter has some candy in his pocket!”

Sheesh Kid!!!!!!! Can you cause me to feel anymore like a criminal today? I quickly return the candy to its wrong spot in the store (guilt) and leave the store feeling very self-conscious.

Aggghh!

We get home and he is in his room and Ella is playing in there also.

Minutes later I hear Ella crying and Sierra comes out to let me know that Porter is pouring water on Ella’s head.

I enter, and cute innocent Ella’s head is soaked and I find one end of a rope tethered around her neck and the other end tethered around his bed post.

“Porter, it’s dangerous to wrap anything around someone’s neck, even if you are pretending they are a dog.”

Let’s just say – the early bedtime was a welcome consequence for Mommy.

And I have decided I’m not going to wait 10 years to laugh about today – I’m going to laugh hysterically… right now. Ha Ha Ha Ha Hee Hee Hee Ha Ha Hee.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Mary Kay Stop N Shop


Everyone is invited. Let your friends know.
Dates: Thursday May 7th - Friday May 8th
Time: 9am - 9pm
Place: My house
Everything is at least 50% off!
Lots of things available at 75% off too!

Here's just a sample of the great prices
Satin Hands Gift Set....$7.50
Men's Skin Care.........$3.50 - $5.50
Mary Kay Sunscreen......$3.50
Perfumes and Colognes...$7.00 - $9.00
Lipsticks...............$6.50
Lipgloss................$6.50
Eyeliner/Lipliner.......$5.00
Eyeshadow...............$3.25

I have everything in stock - so take home whatever you buy. I don't want to move my inventory to Utah with me so take advantage of these low low prices.

You can't get makeup this good so cheap.

Come take some of this stuff off my hands!!

See you there... or rather here!

Out of town customers call me and let me know what I can mail you